A conversation between the mind and the heart

Mind: It’s late. Switch it off and go to sleep.

Heart: I am not sleepy.

Mind: Just stop thinking like the weight of the whole world is on your shoulders and close your eyes.

Heart: If I close my eyes, I’ll cry.

Mind: Ooh God! Not again.

Heart: Yeah yeah don’t be bothered. You can’t understand how I feel because you are THE mind.

Mind: Just relax and try to calm down. You are overthinking and too much juice is flowing inside me to shut it down.

Heart: I feel like I have wasted my whole life doing nothing. I feel useless somedays and question myself that, is my life only limited to waking up, cleaning the house and looking after the kid. And if that so, then why don’t I feel content and satisfied with the way thing have turned out to be.

I’ll try to relax but believe me, to be awake whole night is not my intention. I just can’t stop thinking.

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Mind: Tell me something. What do you want with your life?

Heart: To feel independent. To enjoy life with my loved ones. To live close to them. to feel happy like I use to be. To watch my kid grow old with my other half. To do something with my life. I started writing out of boredom but now I feel passionate about blogging. At least, there is this thing. But something is missing and I can’t seem to point my finger on it.

To go for a long drive every weekend, pull down the window, pop my head out and feel the fresh air on my face.

Mind: What’s stopping you from doing that?

Heart: No one, except, my current situation. I feel helpless. And I can’t do anything about it.

Mind: You know, whatever happens, happens for a reason.

Heart: I know but I feel lonely at times. I feel empty. My emotions are all over the place. I feel that I get annoyed and frustrated very easily. I feel a change in me and I don’t feel happy about it.

I often feel useless and not important.

I was not like this a year before and that’s what bothering me.

Mind: Why happened now?

Heart: Haha life happened. I fail to understand why I feel like the way I do everyday. I want to be my old self.

Mind: You are just being over dramatic, nothing else.

Heart: Yeah maybe but I know how I feel.

Mind: Why don’t you read something to divert yourself.

Heart: I don’t feel like it.

Mind: Ahh, listen to music maybe?

Heart: Nopes, not in a mood. See I told you. There are days when I want to do something to keep myself busy but at the same moment I don’t want to do anything. Its confusing I know. I don’t understand myself sometimes.

Mind: Arghhhh, I feel exhausted and I want to shut it off.

Heart: I’ll try. But don’t blame me if tears start to flow. They might help me to feel little better.

Mind: Good night!

Heart: Until tomorrow.

Posted by

Hello! Welcome to my space. I am a Pakistani from heart, born in Karachi and spent good 27 years of my life in that country. I am happily married and a stay-at-home mom, currently residing in KSA which i now call as my new home. This blog is my happy place where I will post about lots of different things, including my motherhood journey, lifestyle, book reviews, my thoughts and feelings about different issues and generally about my life on the go. I am an introvert who generally sucks at expressing her emotions verbally but loves to write them down. I hope you find the content here relevant and interesting to read. Looking forward to build a great community here. Have a great day!

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