Mind: It’s late. Switch it off and go to sleep.
Heart: I am not sleepy.
Mind: Just stop thinking like the weight of the whole world is on your shoulders and close your eyes.
Heart: If I close my eyes, I’ll cry.
Mind: Ooh God! Not again.
Heart: Yeah yeah don’t be bothered. You can’t understand how I feel because you are THE mind.
Mind: Just relax and try to calm down. You are overthinking and too much juice is flowing inside me to shut it down.
Heart: I feel like I have wasted my whole life doing nothing. I feel useless somedays and question myself that, is my life only limited to waking up, cleaning the house and looking after the kid. And if that so, then why don’t I feel content and satisfied with the way thing have turned out to be.
I’ll try to relax but believe me, to be awake whole night is not my intention. I just can’t stop thinking.
Mind: Tell me something. What do you want with your life?
Heart: To feel independent. To enjoy life with my loved ones. To live close to them. to feel happy like I use to be. To watch my kid grow old with my other half. To do something with my life. I started writing out of boredom but now I feel passionate about blogging. At least, there is this thing. But something is missing and I can’t seem to point my finger on it.
To go for a long drive every weekend, pull down the window, pop my head out and feel the fresh air on my face.
Mind: What’s stopping you from doing that?
Heart: No one, except, my current situation. I feel helpless. And I can’t do anything about it.
Mind: You know, whatever happens, happens for a reason.
Heart: I know but I feel lonely at times. I feel empty. My emotions are all over the place. I feel that I get annoyed and frustrated very easily. I feel a change in me and I don’t feel happy about it.
I often feel useless and not important.
I was not like this a year before and that’s what bothering me.
Mind: Why happened now?
Heart: Haha life happened. I fail to understand why I feel like the way I do everyday. I want to be my old self.
Mind: You are just being over dramatic, nothing else.
Heart: Yeah maybe but I know how I feel.
Mind: Why don’t you read something to divert yourself.
Heart: I don’t feel like it.
Mind: Ahh, listen to music maybe?
Heart: Nopes, not in a mood. See I told you. There are days when I want to do something to keep myself busy but at the same moment I don’t want to do anything. Its confusing I know. I don’t understand myself sometimes.
Mind: Arghhhh, I feel exhausted and I want to shut it off.
Heart: I’ll try. But don’t blame me if tears start to flow. They might help me to feel little better.
Mind: Good night!
Heart: Until tomorrow.
